Have you ever had an itch that you just can’t scratch?
Like my own psychological plaster cast,
Or have you faked a smile behind which envy hides,
I’ve “always been the bridesmaid – never been the bride”
Have you ever lost a friend in a fight?
I’ve had to apologise even though I was right,
Or have you seen the effects of an addiction?
First hand – herbal, man made & prescription
Have you ever hurt when a loved one dies?
I crave their smile, their smell, their eyes…
An unparalleled pain can’t be described,
Imprisoned as a parent who outlived their child
I believed in God until I questioned why,
Now I fear the facts might in fact be lies,
So I’m walking a tunnel that has no light,
On a tour of life without a guide in sight
Although for most, I’m sure you find,
amongst your friends, you all confide,
talking through your daily grind,
discuss emotions but maintain pride
You say that its normal – but it’s not to me,
I ignored the warnings, I was young & naïve,
I stupidly wore my heart on my sleeve,
but all people did was lie and deceive
The people I picked to place faith in,
Were wolves all dressed in sheep’s clothing,
Now my foundations have cracked, and its trust that I lack,
For every step forward, there’s been 2 more steps back
So from now on decisions that I’m asked to make,
No matter; who, where, why, when or what’s at stake,
For fear of repeating the same mistakes,
the panic it comes with I here now forsake!
Despite all my effort and your increasing pressure
The strength that it takes evades what I measure!
You may say that I’m lazy, and I lack motivation
But walk a mile in my shoes
It’s self preservation
© The Piss Poor Poet 2019
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