Overcoming anxiety to accomplish my first 5k run with A Lust for Life

I woke to the sound of my alarm, snoozed it about 3 times and struggled to get out of bed which meant I was already running behind schedule for the Vhi A Lust For Life run which took place in Phoenix Park recently.

Then I realised I couldn’t find the map of the race layout. So being late and not knowing where I was going had sent my mind and my body into a state of panic not to mention the worry I caused myself thinking about traffic and where I could park. I struggle with sleep on a daily basis and most nights only manage to get 2 or 3 hours. This means that my energy levels are extremely low, my appetite varies frequently and I am always freezing. These factors mean I am not being my best self, and the anxiety kicks in.

When I experience these states of panic I normally avoid public situations, as nothing frustrates me more than not being able to be the person that I am. I fought the urge to not get dressed and then I fought the urge of turning back after I had managed to get myself on the road. I won’t lie, it was a mental struggle to get myself to Phoenix Park. I found a parking space much easier than I had expected and two cars down from me I met another lady also unsure of where the run was starting from. We walked together in search of the assembly point facing ditches, dead ends and a lot of fences, eventually we made it across to the other side. And without even noticing my anxiety began to calm.

As I found my race buddies, we collected our t-shirts and helped each other to attach our numbers. I noticed how incredible the atmosphere was, there was music playing and an energetic MC talking us through the warm up. The girls announced that their friend who had only just ran the 10k, was going to join us for the 5k. Instead of being intimidated by this achievement I decided to let her inspire me. I told myself that I was going to get back into my fitness routine and be able to make the same achievements.

In our final 1k, we met Bressie walking towards us. He reassured us that we didn’t have too far to go and stopped for a selfie.

There was no shortage of words of encouragement from stewards, on lookers and even runners from the 10k who stayed around to support. There was an incredible sense of ease being surrounded by people who knew exactly what you’re going through as so many had the same experiences themselves. Being in a setting with people who openly support the cause is hugely refreshing. The openness of it all, the peer to peer support and solidarity was beautiful to experience.

10 years ago I visited my GP and felt ridiculous telling him that I felt sad. Although I am not yet free of my struggles, I have no idea how worse off I would be if I hadn’t asked for help. The best advice I can give to anyone, is to talk. Tell someone about what you are going through. Chances are they’ll tell you they are struggling or have struggled with similar issues. The next important thing to do is prepare and plan. Find the things that make you feel good and make sure you do them every day. Commit to them. Surround yourself with positive people and stay clear of stressful environments.

So there it is, my first 5K run done and dusted. Even though I am not in top form, or in top shape, I am getting there. I feel like I accomplished something and I am proud of myself for pushing through and showing up especially because I spent the previous 5 days in bed. Thankfully I didn’t have to do it all by myself, I had the support and encouragement from two incredible friends. I was inspired by the energy around me and I have now set myself the goal of running it next year. A few weeks on from race day, I am grateful for having had a very different week in comparison to the one before the race.

You will never know how far you can go until you push past your limits.