Mindful West Run: A letter to my 11-year-old self

Dear 11-year-old self,

When you get to my age, you will realise “it was not the end of the world”.

At 11 years old I found myself in a world where my parents had separated. It was 1983 in Ireland when people stayed together, no marriages fell apart, or so I thought. At that time, it was horrific for the 11-year-old and his siblings to be launched in the next couple of years and all that came with it. Our close family member was diagnosed with depression and bi-polar. This was my introduction to the world of mental health. From a very young age, I found myself along with my siblings looking after our family member and dealing with psy-chiatrists and various experts. It all became very normal, bargaining and pleading with our loved one to go into care was a constant uphill battle with emotional boulders and guilt be-ing thrown at you from every direction.

During this time, which carried on right through my teenage years (and subsequently most of my adult life) I was lucky enough to have good friends that I could talk to and the oppor-tunity to take part in the sport of Kayaking. This was to be the key to my mental resilience for many years. Along with the pressure of school, exams and fitting in socially, I knew from an early age that I needed to work on not just my physical strength and wellbeing but also my mental strength and wellbeing. I knew from an early age that mental illness can run in families. Connecting with the outdoors through Kayaking and experiencing the adventure was to be what grounded me.

Did you ever hear the expression “Do something that scares you every day” or “Challenge yourself”? There is a good reason for this. If you learn to push yourself, go outside your comfort zone, you will experience fear and anxiety, which is the amygdala in your brain re-leasing the adrenaline and speeding up your heart, getting ready for battle. This is a physi-cal action in the body.

But what triggers your amygdala?

Your thoughts, yes, your thoughts. Connecting with others, connecting with the outdoors and keeping active all have a positive influence on your thoughts.

Life as that teenager was challenging, but life is challenging. So, we must take responsibil-ity for our mental wellbeing so that we can handle all that life has to throw at us.

Even now in my late 40’s with a fantastic wife and wonderful kids, I am very aware that I need to be the best version of myself for my family. I am also aware that my children need that mental resilience in life too as they navigate the same teenage years and as they enter adulthood. I still firmly believe that challenging yourself, having adventure in your life, con-necting with others and keeping physically fit is the key to it all.

I am lucky enough to have a wonderful group of friends that we have all found an activity that challenges us, connects us, keeps us fit and exposes us to nature and the outdoors. We regularly meet up throughout the week to trail run and take a dip in the ice-cold Irish sea.

We set goals in the autumn so that each spring brings a new challenge. This keeps us moti-vated and helps us encourage each other to get up and out on those dark wet mornings to go for a trail run.

Out of this MinfulWest was born, 280 kilometres, 3 days, Greystones to Galway.
People say, “your mad” “Why would you do that” “ That’s crazy”
I say, maybe, but that’s the adventure, the challenge!
I’ll let you know when it’s done!

I know there will be pain and suffering on the journey, but I also know that it will be worth it.
And as I think back to my 11-year-old self, you did OK! you survived!
“It was not the end of the world”!

The Mindful West run is a 240km run from Greystones to Galway in aid of a Lust for Life and CMRF Crumlin. If you enjoyed this story please donate to the run here.