Can ‘self-affirmation’ make you feel bad? The simple answer is: yes!
Over the years, hundreds, if not thousands of books have been written and even more articles published about courageous people who have overcome their adversities and grew as a result of experiencing them. They passed on their wisdom filling up pop psychology sections with a lot of myths that are sometimes not scientifically tested. Motivational speakers, coaches, therapists and other mental health professionals took them on board and spread the word, assuming they were correct. Whilst we do have evidence that some of them help us, there are many activities recommended by mental health gurus that we either don’t have evidence for, or, what’s even more worrying, we now have evidence to the contrary.
One such myth is ‘self-affirmation’. Bill Cullen famously wrote, that every day, he stands in front of the mirror and tells himself that he is going to have a good day. He believed that his ‘self-affirmations’ gave him the confidence to go to his business meetings and succeed. Many of us reading it trusted it to be true. ‘If it helps Bill Cullen, surely it can help me, too’ – we thought. However, scientific evidence shows a different picture. Whilst, there is evidence to suggest that it may be effective for some people, using self-affirmations should be done with caution, because, research also shows that ‘self-affirmation’ may not be good for people who have lower self-esteem. The unfortunate thing is that often, those with lower self-esteem can be more attracted to using ‘self-affirmations’. Testing such assumptions is one aspect of the science of positive psychology.
Positive psychology is often mistaken for ‘positive thinking’ or pop psychology. However, this assumption could not be further from the truth. Positive psychologists appreciate the importance of balance and realise that too much positivity may actually be detrimental to us. We also know that experiencing some of life’s adversities, could actually make us feel stronger and improve our overall wellbeing. Therefore, ‘blind’ positive thinking for the sake of it may be delusional and not considered good for us.
Positive psychology is also not the same as pop psychology. The significant difference between them is that positive psychology findings are based on rigorous scientific research to evaluate whether an activity does what it says on the tin. On the other hand, pop psychology may be more likely to spread the myths without any scientific basis.
Let’s take an example of a well-known gratitude activity, which encourages people to regularly count their blessings. In order to validate this activity, over 30 experiments took place around the world with people of various ages and professions. These experiments gave us evidence to suggest that counting blessings does indeed enhance one’s wellbeing, however, when it’s overdone (e.g. doing this activity every day for many months) it may have the opposite effect. Therefore, science suggests that doing it regularly once a week or a few times a week may actually be more beneficial than doing it every day. Also, we know that asking people to explain why they are grateful for something could have an even more powerful effect on their wellbeing than merely asking them to list what they are grateful for. I believe that this is one of the most beneficial functions of positive psychology. It provides us with validated interventions and science-based information about what may enhance our lives.
Another very important function of positive psychology is that it offers balance in psychology as a whole. After the Second World War, psychologists went on a quest to learn about all that is wrong with humans. Social psychologists tried to figure out why good people followed seemingly evil leaders; developmental psychologists attempted to see how the scars of the war would negatively affect the young people and their resilience throughout their lives; whilst the clinical psychologists tried to establish how to diagnose mental illness and what we can do to help people recover from it. Their quest resulted in a negative bias, whereby, 17 out of 18 studies in psychology were all about what is wrong with people, rather than right. Whilst we knew a lot about different negative emotions, we knew comparatively very little about positive emotions. Whilst we were learning about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, we hardly considered Post Traumatic Growth. Whilst we thoroughly studied human weaknesses, we had very little knowledge about human strengths.
Positive psychology attempts to re-balance this imbalance, therefore, it is a scientific study of all that is considered to be good with people. It covers such topics as character strengths, passions, motivations, high performance, it delves into what makes people thrive and what we can do to make it happen, it looks at optimism and how we can learn it. Consequently, it is a study that provides us with knowledge of how we can achieve our full potential.
This is the first of the series of blogs about positive psychology. Over the next few weeks, I will take you on a journey to discover your strengths, your passions, boost your wellbeing, resilience, optimism. I will help you enhance your positive emotions and guide you on how to thrive in the midst of life challenges. Finally, with the assistance of evidence based activities and the science of positive psychology, I will help you live your life to the full.
So, if you’re ready, buckle up! Your life is about to change for the better.
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