In a nutshell yes, Imposter Syndrome is very real and can be bad for our mental, physical and emotional health.
But, at its essence Imposter Syndrome is just a story we repeat again and again and one that can be retold differently. Our stories are made up from our beliefs, so looking at the belief that underpins feelings of Imposter Syndrome is the key to unlocking it and kicking it to touch.
Our beliefs are formed from what we believe to be true, whether that be truths about ourselves or others. Many of our core beliefs got formed when we were young and were influenced by the way we saw the world playing out in front of us and how we saw ourselves fitting in with it. We formed beliefs from what we were told was right and wrong from our caregivers and from society in general. We may have tried on different masks, testing and trying, seeing which one got us the best result.
One person’s empathic true nature may have gained them no favours, so they swiftly hid this side of themselves and put on a tougher mask to gain love, acceptance and a sense of belonging.
Our ego speaks our beliefs and replays them in our head, day in and day out. We all have an ego, it’s a part of us, however in its more negative aspect the ego is the voice of the imposter. It keeps repeating and confirming our beliefs that say “I am not good enough, not tall enough, not smart enough, not …. whatever enough.
AND it wears its’ associated emotion like an ornamental cloak, whether that be shame, guilt or anger. It stands mighty and tall and can produce a sword or loudspeaker to make itself bigger, bolder or more audible as it repeats yet again just how awful things are.
However, this imposter with its mighty sword and cloak can be toppled as, its foundations are not build on anything real, concrete or true.
Remember – it is just a part of us, it’s an old belief that’s stuck, an old mind story that formed. And it loves nothing more than confirming itself over and over.
Prolonged repression of our core self can leave us feeling exhausted, depressed or can manifest as stress in our body. We may feel we can’t move forward no matter how much effort we put in, we may be exhausted trying.
We just need to shed some light on this imposter and it is important to do so with respect, remembering it may be there for many years and it may be who it is because it thought it had no choice. Remember that little empathic boy or girl who may have been ridiculed for the way they were and so put on a mask to hide their true self? We need to accept the story on which our beliefs were founded realising at that time we merely sought to fit in or belong.
We can begin to weed out the parts of the story that are untrue and leave all the masks behind.
You don’t need to hide your true self from anyone. You can be who you are. You just need to be courageous. The ego may stand up taller and challenge you to a dual. Remember though that the ego is a part of you and so you have a choice who to listen to; the real you or the one who has donned a mask to belong.
You can take control back and thank the imposter for its learning, you are stronger and more resilient for having had the courage to change your story.
Most importantly – don’t listen to the Imposter Syndrome. You are real.