In the sixth part of our series on ‘How to Mind Yourself’, the Self Care Sundays Podcast Team talk about how they take care of their mental health.
If you’d like to read more about self care, here’s the first, second, third, fourth and fifth part of the series.
What does self-care mean to you?
Aditi: Self-care, to me, means having the tools that you need to thrive in this world. It is about how you approach the world and navigate it. The Self Care Sundays podcast focuses on self-care practices that don’t require money because, as I learned more about self-care, I realized that the things you can buy are not sufficient to sustain you. We also focus on people from marginalized communities because, in conversations about self-care and wellness, the unique needs and challenges of these people are often overlooked. I believe that self-care does not exist without community care – that is, we cannot take care of ourselves alone. We all need connection, and communities often provide the time and resources for us to care for ourselves. Focusing on self-care for those most marginalized in our communities is a tide that lifts all boats.
What does your daily routine look like, and how do you integrate ways to mind your mental health?
Sophie: Having a daily routine each day is something that helps my mental health immensely. It puts me at ease knowing my day has a plan. Without one, my anxiety can get the best of me and throw a wrench in my day. My routine almost always consists of making sure I eat three meals a day. This was initially hard for me because, when I am stressed or feeling down, my appetite completely vanishes. I could go almost the whole day eating hardly anything, but I had to realize that this actually makes me feel worse than I already would have. Making sure I eat three balanced meals a day makes my day feel much more balanced and healthy.
Another aspect of my routine is always scheduling in a block where I can just relax at some point of the day, whether that be listening to music, talking a walk, or just watching TV. Within the last year, I’ve recognized that I need that time to decompress and rejuvenate. Whenever I didn’t take that time, I would find my stress levels skyrocketing throughout the last half of the day.
What are the habits that make the biggest difference to your mental health?
Kennedy: As someone who struggles with mental illness, my needs at any given moment are ever-changing. Paying attention to my stress levels or triggers helps me to avoid them in the future, but dealing with things like random assignments or even unpredictable weather are triggers that are not within my control. For this reason, having an array of coping mechanisms to deploy for different and unpredictable situations helps me stay levelled throughout the year. In winters, for example, when there isn’t much sunshine, I make sure I use my light therapy lamp more often when I know I’ll have to stay inside. I also know that I can get burnt-out near the end of the spring semester, so I make sure I can get outside and run once or twice a week to help manage my anxiety. Being able to foresee what’s coming and plan ahead makes a huge difference for my mental health in the long run.
Are there any other ways in which you make time to ‘mind yourself’ on a regular basis? (ie holidays, time with friends, digital detoxes, etc?)
Sophie: One thing that I do in order to ‘mind myself’ throughout the day is to do at least one breathing exercise, whether it be on an app on my phone or just taking five deep breathes on my own. For a good portion of my life, I’ve struggled with having anxiety attacks whenever a stressful situation would come my way. Doing breathing exercises gives me something to focus on other than the anxiety and stress itself, and ultimately, it calms me down.
It’s impossible to avoid stressful situations. To build on what Kennedy said above, there are certain things you cannot control. It gives me great peace of mind knowing that each day I can at least control how I react to those situations with just doing those simple exercises.
What does a balanced life mean to you?
Kennedy: For me, balance refers to the time I spend in the past, present, and future. I think a lot of the time people stress the importance of “being present” and experiencing life as it unfolds. But I think there is value in allowing yourself time to be somewhere else, be it reflecting on the past or visualizing the person you would like to be in the future. Revisiting the things that have happened to me through therapy has helped me learn more about myself and see the past with more clarity. Conversely, trying to envision my future while making plans and goals for myself keeps me from getting trapped in introspection. It helps me push through whatever is going on with me right now and stay focused on my personal goals that can be achieved later on. Ultimately, it’s about striking a balance between those three states of mind.
Are there things you say ‘no’ to that help you? (ie not reading emails after a certain time, saying no to social engagements when you don’t feel up to it etc?)
Jess: I used to listen to political radio when I would drive, but this is something I’ve completely stopped in the past 3-4 months. I consume the news in some way, shape, or form throughout my entire waking hours, whether it’s through sitting down and watching TV, getting a breaking news notification on my cell phone’s lock screen, or scrolling through Twitter. If I were to listen to the news in the car as well, there wouldn’t be a time of day where I was shutting myself off to stop receiving the news. Now when I drive, I listen to either an upbeat playlist I’ve made for myself (which is one of my personal favorite forms of self-care, by the way) or a lighthearted podcast. Since I’m driving, I am not looking at my phone or any of the news notifications at all. To accompany this, even if it’s just for 15-30 minutes, turning off my receptiveness to the constant cycle of changing (and often taxing) news and not listening to political radio has left me feeling less drained throughout the day.
If someone is starting out to try and bring some meaningful self-care into their routine, what advice might you give them?
Jess: Self-care isn’t always a “pretty” and scheduled thing. Surely, it can be, but self-care exists on a spectrum. I mentioned above how much I enjoy making playlists on Spotify, and I block off 15-20 minutes a few nights a week to do so. That being said, sometimes we need to integrate self-care into our lives when it isn’t necessarily “convenient” or worth capturing a picture of. Self-care is letting yourself cry. It’s sitting in the dark and breathing. It’s vigorously writing down frustrated thoughts to get it out of your system when you’re reaching overload. Don’t be fooled into thinking self-care is something that needs to look good and presentable on Instagram.
Have you any advice on sustaining good habits?
Aditi: My biggest advice is to be kind to yourself. This season of Self Care Sundays focused on how to habitualize good habits because it is something that I struggle with implementing in my life. I learned from our guests that their habits changed with different phases of their lives, depending on what was going on with school, work, relationships, or family. I was feeling like a failure for struggling to sustain a self-care routine rather than realizing that change is normal. We are all constantly in the process of practicing self-care. It is a “practice” because it requires practice and adjustment. It is not a destination that we reach and maintain. Rather, it is a journey of constant discovery and rediscovery as our needs and goals change.
BIO
Self Care Sundays are a podcast dedicated to exploring accessible, non-commercialized self-care within communities of colour. Our team consists of host Aditi Juneja, producer Jess Talwar, audio engineer Cato Zane, and communications interns Sophie Gomez and Kennedy Freeman.
In Season 1, Aditi and her guests explored ideas of self-care with an intersectional lens. This inaugural season has been discussed on Refinery29, Resistance Dashboard, Sirius XM’s Progress station, and the podcasts Resilient Lawyer with Jeena Cho, Pantsuit Nation, and Igniting Change with Barbara Arnwine.
In the upcoming season, Aditi and the team will investigate how to habitualize self-care and integrate it into daily life.
Host Aditi Juneja (@AditiJuneja3), Producer Jess Talwar (@jesstalwar), and Student Interns Sophie Gomez (@_sophiegomez_) and Kennedy Freeman (@whomthatboi)
Self Care Sundays is also available on Twitter and Instagram at @selfcaresundays and on Facebook as @selfcaresundayspodcast.
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