Grief Encounters is a weekly podcast series that looks at an issue that affects us all and yet remains so difficult to talk about: grief. Hosted by Venetia Quick and Sasha Hamrogue, the pair are hoping to open up the conversation around loss and create a modern platform for people to share their own experiences, and start open dialogue around the subject of death and all that comes with it.
This week’s Sasha meets the award winning UK writer Louisa young, who’s book You Left Early accounts her relationship with Robert Lockhart, an extremely talented and prolific composer from Wigan, who battled with alcohol addiction throughout his life.
Loving an addict can be incredibly difficult thing to do. It’s a relationship that is often rampant with deceit & disappointment, and sadly more often than not, the addiction comes out on top. Louisa is a hugely empathetic person, and this is extremely prevalent in how she views addiction and the addict themselves. “The thing about an addict is, it may not be their fault that they’re and addict. I don’t believe it is their fault. They didn’t ask for the particular set-up of genes and experience and psychology, and everything that adds up to a person being addictive.” Louisa and Robert both struggled through the addiction and with an incredible amount of hard work, he was able to take command of his sobriety.
Although sober, years of heavy alcohol abuse had left Robert extremely ill. He was diagnosed with throat cancer, and managed to survive it. “He really suffered but he was a very battered but gallant, marvellous man. Then after all that, and all those things which could have killed him, he actually died by accident.” Their love story is one that seems desperately unfair, and Louisa speaks about this in great detail during the interview. She also puts a huge emphasis on how although Robert is no longer living, she does still consider him a huge part of her life presently. ‘I miss him everyday. I am incredibly happy not to be living with alcoholism in my everyday life. Even an alcoholic in recovery, it’s still a very hard full time job, both for the addict and for the people closest to them”
If you’re looking for a safe haven to express how you feel, share articles, photos, memories and more, join the Grief Encounters Facebook Group. A place for support, compassion and empathy for those grieving.
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