Cleaning as therapy? On Instagram, it is….

cleaning-as-therapy-on-instagram-it-is

Everyone’s suddenly cleaning on Instagram! In the last few weeks, 3 ladies and their cleaning routines, tips and advice have taken the online platform by storm. 2 of the accounts are in the UK, @mrshinchhome_x_ and @littlemissmops, but one, @_ellenokeeffe is Irish, based in Waterford. “What’s the fascination?” you might ask, and I did too, as I found myself mesmerised by their gleaming ‘after’ pictures. Especially those of @littlemissmops, (Carli) who is a professional cleaner, and is often briefed to clean really dirty and neglected houses and flats, typically end-of-tenancy. And I mean REALLY dirty. Manky. Not your normal evening’s entertainment you might think, but there is something strangely fascinating about watching the whole process unfold. You look at the oven door caked with 17 layers of ancient grease and food, and think “no WAY is she getting that gunk gleaming”. But she does. GLEAMING.

Suddenly my own oven looks in the need of a good scrub. I’m no domestic goddess, I would rate myself somewhere between “sloth” and “keep us from Typhoid” (my grandmother’s phrase – she reared 9 children, plus 4 of her widowed brother’s children, plus various other waifs and strays – if it was good enough for her, it’s good enough for me.) so my oven is… not gleaming. Inspired by the visuals and enthusiasm of the ladies – and their various followers who are now sending in their own before and after pics – I get stuck in, and an hour later, feel INORDINATELY happy that my oven would pass muster if the two from ‘how clean is your house’ suddenly descended with their feather-boa rubber gloves, and gave it the once-over.

Why, Niamh, WHY?

Next, @littlemissmops starts share all the messages she’s been getting from women who’ve been struggling with their mental health, either depression, or anxiety, or both. Who’ve been struggling to get motivated, or active, or organised, and are stuck at home, feeling isolated and overwhelmed. By watching Carli they’ve been encouraged to start cleaning, to start clearing, to start making little, gradual improvements in their homes. And it helps them feel better. And not just one or two people – hundreds. (As I write this article Mrs Hinch is sharing that she’s just hit 150 thousand followers, [that’s 15 thousand new followers in 24 hours] and a message from a mum whose partner walked out on her and her 2 children, she’d been struggling to keep on top of things, but now credits Mrs H with giving her back her zest and energy)

Now, I’m REALLY fascinated. As a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist, my daily work involves doing the exact same thing. The vast majority of my work is with Anxiety, closely followed by Depression. Common issues include feeling overwhelmed, dreading previously ‘normal’ activities, a permanent sense of unease and/or being ‘different to everyone else’ as a result, but lacking the motivation, energy or knowledge to know what to do about it. During CBT we work on helping people rediscover their energy and getting back on top of their everyday lives and challenges. Sessions are spent looking at the unhelpful thinking (or Cognitions) and behaviours that are underlying their issues, understanding how and why these unhelpful habits started, and are persisting, and most importantly, learning the skills and techniques to change and overcome them.

So, just what is it about these cleaning accounts? Not just what exactly they’re doing, but HOW are they doing it? Let’s see.

Behavioural Activation

Behavioural Activation, (the technical term for getting active!) is a therapeutic approach that aims to increase activities that increase feelings of achievement or enjoyment, decrease activities that maintain or worsen low mood, and encourage a problem-solving approach (“what would help me fix this?”), rather than a “problem-describing” one (“this is so awful, how bad is this situation I’m in..”), and is the first intervention used when working in CBT to treat depression. In a study reported in The Lancet in 2016, Behavioural Activation alone – that is, without the working on the cognitions (thoughts) that underpin low mood – was found to be as effective as full CBT. Daily, purposeful activity is a protective factor for mood in the longer term, as well improving it in the short term.

And… guess what the cleaning insta ladies are doing? Correct. They’re encouraging activity that produces feelings of achievement. (HOW satisfying is it saying goodbye to that gunk..?) They’re discouraging sitting around dwelling on things rather than trying to improve them. And when we achieve one small thing, what are we inclined to do? Another one. Activation in motion. Nothing big or complicated, just simple encouragement, modelling, sharing. “You can do it! Do it with us!” And we are. In our 100s.

Chunking

A huge issue in depression is lethargy. The feeling that nothing will help, or make a difference to your mood, or will take FOREVER to do, and the resulting inertia, the complete lack of energy, compounds things. Breaking seemingly overwhelming tasks into small manageable ‘chunks’ helps them seem a) easier to complete, and b) shorter to finish, and c) just more… doable. “Just clean the loo – look- you’ll have it done in the ad break of your favourite programme. Watch me do it, now you try.. ” And we do – because all of a sudden it doesn’t seem too hard, or pointless. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.

Modelling

The impulse buy, the online shop inspired by late night “influencer” creeping? We’re hugely affected by what we see around us. Alone with depressed and anxious thoughts, we see doom, threat, risk, fear. Watching the ladies, we see hope, encouragement, friendly advice. They advocate being kind, helping each other, doing things that make us feel better. Small, easy to achieve things. I can do that!

Visualisation

Being able to imagine something happening REALLY helps us to do that thing. If your depressed mind is telling you “nothing is going to make you feel better, so don’t bother your arse trying…” you’ll believe it (you probably don’t have the energy to argue back..). Whereas looking at and seeing the satisfaction on little miss mops face when she gets rid of another oven-load of MANK, helps blow that theory out of the water. (Important note – depression lies. Prove this by seeing if you’d say the stuff you say to yourself when you’re low, to anyone else? Thought so. You wouldn’t dream of it, because, if you stop and question it, in your heart you know it’s a) harsh and b) unhelpful.) The brain believes what it sees. That’s why we jump at a scary movie when we know we’re safe on the sofa…! So when the IG ladies play us a continuous reel of achievement, and show us their success and satisfaction – it gives us a new picture to look at, and start to see for ourselves.

Inclusion

Mental health issues isolate us. We feel alone, that no-one else is this bad, or struggles with stuff the way we do. We blame ourselves for not coping better. For being ‘weak’. St Pats Mental Health Services published their annual survey this week and it makes for sobering reading. 61% of adults surveyed believe that treatment for a mental health difficulty is a sign of personal failure, yet 57% questioned are afraid that they will experience a mental health difficulty in the future, and 65% felt that mental health issues are not spoken about enough in the media. So in this time of endless comparisons and still, stigma, the cleaning accounts are a breath of fresh air. They remind us of our similarities, how we can help and support each other, and make no big deal of our flaws. They’re 3 very different personalities, with 3 very different homes, but their mission is the same – to clean, but also to encourage, to include, to help us feel like we belong. And if our homes start to gleam at the same time, how bad? No typhoid here, granny.

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Article by Niamh Connolly
Niamh Connolly works as a CBT psychotherapist in Dungarvan Co. Waterford, and also runs seminars and workshops country wide on various mental health topics from anxiety and stress, to wellbeing and personal development. Website | Instagram | Facebook.
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