Are you thinking about suicide as an option for you?

Thanks for taking a few minutes to read this, it won’t take very long. I can only assume that things in your life have become very painful, overwhelming and seemingly unbearable for you to have gotten to the point of considering ending your own life.

Firstly the fact that you are considering suicide does not mean you are ‘crazy’, selfish or weak. Many people visit this place when their perceived capacity to cope seems less than the demands of what it is they are struggling to cope with. Most people can find a way to go on. You can too, even if you are in a lot of pain.

There are a few things you might like to consider before making the massive and permanent decision to end your life through lethal self injury.

Keep yourself safe. If you are in proximity of lethal means, like medications or a rope, remove these from your vicinity. Give yourself time to think.

Wait. The worst time to kill yourself is when you are feeling suicidal. The simple fact is that this option will always be available to you. It is also true to say that pain, emotional and psychological pain that is, is almost always temporary, or at least waxes and wanes in intensity. As such things are likely at some point in the future to seem better than they do right now. This might be very hard to see at this moment, but if you think about your lived experience, it’s unlikely that everything was always unbearable. It might also be of interest to you, that almost all of those people who survive a suicide attempt, do not go on to end their lives. It might be worth asking yourself why, and please have a look at some of the attempt survivor stories on this website livethroughthis.org. Many people have walked up to the edge of suicide and the overwhelming majority have chosen to stay with life for simple reasons: Things might improve: It is possible to find ways to stop what is causing you pain or find ways to cope with it.

Try talking with someone:

• You love
• Who loves you
• You like
• Who likes you
• You respect
• Is trustworthy

Many people say that simply sharing the pain they are in, with someone who might be able to help, or who can really understand what you are going through, is of enormous help. If you haven’t tried this yet, write down a list of options of people you might choose to talk with. If you can’t think of anyone try the following (e.g. Samaratins, Console, Pieta House, GP, Mental Health Clinician, Counsellor/Psychotherapist).

Help can help. Whatever the problems are in your life there are many ways to help. There are many ways to help with emotional and psychological pain, loss, stress, despair, hopelessness and loneliness. Have you tried all of the ways there are to help? Have you talked to someone who knows about this type of help? Your life is worth saving, make sure you’ve given yourself every chance of things improving before you choose to end it. Discuss options with a trusted friend or family member, a therapist or counsellor, your GP or mental health clinician. If they don’t know enough answers, seek out others. Be relentless, you are worth the effort.

Biological death will not meet your needs: It is true to say that biological death is an end. And yes, it would be an end to your pain. However there are some major draw backs. You wont be able to experience what that end might be like. There is no relief, no joy, no feeling of safety or security in biological death because you won’t have a body, mind and heart available to you to experience relief. You will no longer be here to experience anything. Whatever it is you are seeking, whatever struggles you are enduring, biological death is almost certainly not a solution to those difficulties.

Well done. It is a testament to your resilience and endurance that you have survived while experiencing such pain that has pushed you to think about ending your life. Congratulations on making it this far. Well done on reading this; proof positive that you can endure, strive forward, and put your mind to something, even when things seem so bleak. Make yourself this promise: I will seek to discover ways to solving the problems in my life, other than biological death through lethal self injury. I will be certain I have exhausted all avenues, and spoken to everyone who might be able to help. I will learn everything I can do about the kinds of difficulties I’m going through and find others who have survived. I will learn from them and find my own path forward. I’m going to think about what my life would look like if it were really worth living, and try to work towards this. If I don’t get there, you’ll find me crawling tooth and nail towards it.

• Do not go gentle into that good night,
• Old age should burn and rave at the close of day;
• Rage, rage against the dying of the light. – Dylan Thomas

You might be feeling a little relieved after reading this, or at least it has given you pause for thought. That’s great. Perhaps now would be a good time to do something kind for yourself; it might be something very simple like taking a deep breath with your eyes closed, having a bath, walking outside in the rain with your face turned up into the sky. The fact that you have entered into suicidality, and are pausing is also a great time to consider talking with someone. Let someone know this is where you are. Take the next steps forward towards a life worth living, and congratulate yourself for seeing the wisdom in this decision. I wish you well. Thanks for taking the time to pause here with us for these few minutes.

Help information

If you need to talk to someone please contact:

• Samaritans 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.org
• Pieta House 01 601 0000 or email mary@pieta.ie – (suicide, self-harm)
• yourmentalhealth.ie
• Aware 1800 80 48 48 (depression, anxiety)
• National Suicide Helpline 1800 247 247 – (suicide prevention, self-harm, bereavement)

If living in Ireland you can find accredited therapists in your area here:

• iacp.ie
• iahip.org
• counsellingdirectory.ie