Getting closer to realising your dream is a challenging task on its own. But it can become even harder if you fall victim to the so-called dream killers. People who surround you might potentially reduce your energy and enthusiasm, effectively preventing you from becoming everything you can be in life.
But dream killers aren’t only people. It can be less material factors such as fear, past failures or exhaustion. All of these take a great toll on your life and make it more difficult to reach your life goals.
Fortunately, it’s possible to deal with these dream killers and move past their limitations. Here are 6 tips to help you identify dream killers and reduce their influence on your drive to success.
1. Your Family
It might come as a surprise, but that’s the truth. Sometimes the worst dream killers can be found among those closest to us. Since we don’t choose the family we’re born into, sometimes the people in our family circle don’t always support our dreams. Family members might ridicule your dream or speak out of jealousy to make you question it.
How to deal with this problem? Identify members of your family and other relatives who cause you distress. Then commit to your dream and stay alert to the words of these people, all the while knowing that what they say shouldn’t affect your quest. Try and let their words wash over you, knowing that these hurtful words probably come from a place of their own deep fears, their own lack of self-worth, rather than being about you. Turn it around and perhaps dig deep to find empathy for them. Then stay focused on your dream.
Even if it hurts, don’t let these people crush your aspirations so easily – soon enough, you’ll show them what you’re worth.
2. Your Friends
Your friends can become dangerous dream killers too. Be very careful about who you share your dreams with, especially when your idea is in the early stages. ‘How’ people (people who get stuck into the nitty gritty details of ‘but how will you do it etc.…’) can kill an idea before it gets time and space to form fully.
Sometimes it’s a good idea to ignore friendly advice and stick to your vision. But how to tell which friends have your best interest at heart and which ones are simply jealous of your passion? Take a closer look at your friend circle. Did any of them exhibit negativity about your dream before? Maybe they feel miserable and want to spread their mindset around? If there’s a person like that in your circle, do your best to avoid them.
The company you keep has a great impact on your life. Research shows that the right social circle can boost your performance and help you get closer to your dream.
3. Your ‘Superiors’
Those who have authority over you might be crushing your dream as well. It’s quite simple – your boss might feel threatened by your vision and actively prevent you from realising your goals.
If you suspect your boss might be feeling as if they’re losing control over your talent and passion, confiding in them might do the trick. Before they start acting on their sentiment, you can have an honest conversation with them to show that you don’t want to challenge their status.
If you’d like to leave your current workplace, prepare for your supervisor to tempt you with interesting things to keep you where you are. Resist these temptations and keep your eyes firmly on your goal.
4. Past Failures
Your past mistakes might become a serious dream killer as well.
We often forget that all great winners lose at some point in their life – usually more than once. However, there’s no better lesson than failure. Instead of feeling ashamed of it, consider failure as an immensely valuable learning opportunity which will help you to get closer to your dream.
A failure from the past doesn’t define who you are right now. It shouldn’t pose limits to what you can achieve either.
Embrace failure as part of your road to success and find strength in it to keep on chasing your dream.
5. Your Exhaustion
If you feel fatigue, no wonder you’re unable to visualise yourself achieving your goal.
But don’t give up on that dream. Sure, you might feel tired and discouraged at the moment, but your goals are far more important than that – they define your life, give you purpose, and build your identity.
Take a moment to reflect on your wellbeing. Relax, meditate and move your body. Allow yourself some time for deeper connection with yourself and what is going on for you right now, and take proper care of your wellbeing.
Don’t sweat it – you aren’t in a rush. Your dream will be waiting for you, even if it takes a while for you to get there.
6. Your Fear
Finally, your fear can become a powerful dream killer if you allow it to take over your mind. If you give in to fear, frustration and other negative emotions, your vision will become blurred and you’ll hardly remember what your dream was about.
More importantly, fear will discourage you from taking risks.
How to deal with this type of fear? Just make the decision to let it go. You won’t achieve anything until you do. Find courage – you’ve got only one life to live, so make sure that every single second brings you closer to your vision.
If you don’t take this chance now, it’s possible that you’ll regret it later in your life. Go for it. You owe it to yourself.
If you manage to spot these 6 serious dream killers in time, you’ll stand a greater chance at taking control of them and removing them from your life. And it’s definitely in your interest – only then you’ll be able to focus on achieving your dream.
For more information on James’ work, check out Bend + Mend
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