Some of us put so much focus on taking care of others that we neglect our own needs and desires. And some of us are so accustomed to giving our love away to others that we forget to save some for ourselves.
“The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others.” – Sonya Friedman
In my work, I talk a lot about how we can honour ourself, our needs and desires. To honour ourself means that we look after and show ourselves as much love and kindness as we might show other people in our life.
Does it ever feel like you are more present for other people, that you are more connected and in tune with the needs of people around you or that you want to please everyone?
If the answer is yes then it is time you start to show some appreciation to yourself. You need to fill your own tank so that you can take care of the people around you.
Here are some simple ways that you can honour yourself more:
1. Redefine the word selfish
Spending time refuelling and nurturing your own individual needs does not make you selfish. In order to care for and love those around you with the intensity and passion that you want to be remembered for it is so important to look after you, first! Your needs and desires are important. Self-care is not self-indulgent, it is an act of self-preservation.
Schedule weekly ‘alone time’ and commit to this time as much as you would a doctor’s appointment. Use this time to refuel and recharge your batteries.
2. Spend time with your thoughts and emotions
Some of us love to talk about our feelings to anyone who will listen. We analyse, pick apart and justify our feelings yet we rarely sit with ourselves and really feel them. We are afraid to really feel our emotions, afraid of the pain, feeling like a failure or afraid of not having it together and losing control. We chose to ignore these feelings by distracting ourselves with unhealthy relationships (even obsessions) with shopping, drinking alcohol, watching TV, overeating or over exercising. We might calm down, get alone time or treat ourselves for a brief moment when in actual fact this is just a band aid solution. We become numb to our feelings.
To truly connect with your feelings and emotions you will have to get comfortable with the idea of being uncomfortable. The art of self-acceptance is about accepting who you are, warts and all! A daily mindfulness practice will empower you to take stock of your feelings in a non-judgemental way.
3. Get Creative
Creativity can help to revive your passion and lust for life. When we are being creative we become lost in the moment – this is also known as flow – and we stop thinking about what we shoulda/woulda/coulda do and instead live in the moment.
Open yourself up to new possibilities and experiences by starting a Personal YES Campaign. Say yes to life, and trying out new things. The best way to discover what you are passionate about is to start living life outside of your comfort zone.
4. Your body is a temple
We all know by now that certain foods, chemicals, and substances can work against us in all areas of life, so make sure that you put into your body things that will make you feel good. If you are feeling imbalanced in life make sure to address what foods and drinks you are consuming first.
Start the day with a home made and nutritious breakfast packed full of healthy fats and proteins that will fuel you for the day.
5. Get physical
Our bodies are so much more than objects to make lean, pretty, skinny, bulked up etc. Our bodies are vehicles for us to express and feel strength, speed, agility, mobility, flexibility and so much more! It is time for us to celebrate our bodies.
Take a fitness class, challenge your body to do and experience new things, go dancing, go outside for a brisk walk or learn a new skill. Our bodies are capable of so many things so honour your entire body by celebrating what it CAN do.
These are just a few of the many things you can do to honour yourself. Have you tried doing some of them?
If not, it’s time that you start saying yes to yourself!
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